Just a quick note

Tonight was one of those nights. You know the ones where the kids don't do a thing you NEED for them to do and everything quickly turns into DRAMA. It didn't help that little sleep took place here in our house last night. I think I slept in 3 different beds and probably would have slept in Ally's bed had it been made for adults! Since I couldn't sleep in her bed, she got in my bed as did Anna Lea AND Jon Brent. At one point there were 4 of us in a full size bed. I said, "ENOUGH!" Someone, EVERYONE is going back to their bed. That didn't last either.

Anyway, back to THIS night. I was feeling very overwhelmed as a mother to these precious children and very inadequate. I was missing Jason terribly and to be TOTALLY honest, I was having another pity party. I was asking myself over and over, "How am I going to raise these children without Jason?" Of course, there were tears. From everyone. Anna Lea was in trouble for not doing what I asked her to do. Jon Brent fell asleep in the car on the way home and when he woke up he was a BEAR! Ally was tired and ready for food and I was exhausted!

And then God showed up! Just like He always does. I sat down at the table for just a second to read my mail in the midst of the chaos. I opened a letter from a name I didn't recognize. It was handwritten on white computer paper. I began to read and immediately I began to cry. So much that I couldn't even read the words.

The letter was from a 75 year old lady, who also lost her husband in her late 30's with 2 children. I was more than intrigued by her words. She started by telling me who she was...the aunt of Mike Madaris. Wow. I have never met this sister in Christ before, but oh how she ministered to my broken heart tonight. Her words were simple yet I could totally relate to what she wrote as she had walked where I am walking even now.

She knew I needed these words at this very moment: "I know it is an overwhelming responsibility to you, but with God's help, you will make it as you live one day at a time. I know how it isn't easy. This has been (and still is) a blessing to me that through our veil of tears, we see in a new light, Him who was 'despised and rejected of men... a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.' Isaiah 53:3. We become better acquainted with Christ when we experience His teaching, love and sympathy in times of suffering and sorrow. In suffering, Jesus becomes a necessity to us - not just a half-hearted luxury. Through the recognition of our own helplessness, we feel a new strength in His strong arms."

Isn't it amazing how God shows up not a second too late? I don't find it a coincidence that I hadn't already opened this letter. I am not sure if this dear believer in Christ reads blogs or even has email, but thank you, Mrs. Stanford. Thank you for being an encouragement to my weary soul on this January 12, 2009.